2 Cent Headache

Did you know that US Postage was going up to 39 cents starting on Monday? Now, 2 cents wouldn't be something I would normally sweat. I regularly throw away the little buggers when the urge to clean my car washes over me. You see. I just sent out 150 wedding invites. Each of which contains an RSVP card which is now 2 cents short. It isn't fair. Not fair at all!

After discovering this bit of information, I hauled my fat ass down to the very counter I bought the stamps from a mere three weeks ago and asked how this could have possible happened and what my options where. It was obvious that the African man staring back at me from the counter- although very nice- had no idea why I was in such a tizzy. Anyway, he quickly pawned my woes onto a co-worker.

This are the conclusions we came to:

1. I'm fucked

2. Some RSVPs will slide through under the "transition" phase of the rate change.

3. Some will be returned to my guests with a note stamped on the envelope that I swear will read, "The bride invited you to her wedding, but was to cheap or stupid to add the 2 cent stamp you will now have to go out of your way to purchase so that you can do her the honor of showing up to her wedding and showering her and her new husband with a gift you don't feel like purchasing and eating the chicken in "package A" she has decided is good enough because she didn't have enough money in her budget to feed you the Grade A sirloin you really deserve!"

4. Some will make it to my front door only to be stopped by my mail carrier, who may or may not decide to drop it off and pay the 2 cents out of his pocket so that he doesn't have to deal with it- yeah right!

5. My mail man will probably not take pity on me and will return it to his hub in which a notice will be sent to me saying that I again have to haul my fat ass down to the post office and pay the 2 cents per envelope to find out who will or will not be at my wedding

6. The nice African post office employee had suggested to his boss that a poster or other form of notice should probably be posted in order to inform people of the rate change, but still doesn't know why the Boss didn't do that. (Mind you, a flyer was still not posted when I went down there this morning).

7. Did I mention that I'm fucked

And before you all think I'm nuts and find it necessary to point out that the chick who sold me the stamps would have had no way to know that they where for a wedding invitation that included an RSVP- you would be WRONG. She did know and found it necessary to chastise me for choosing to stick my chosen "Greta Garbo" stamps on the envelopes rather than the traditional "Love" stamp most decent brides feature proudly on their envelopes. I want to kill her.